Oh, friends. I feel like I have so much to tell you. So much to write about. Yet, I’m pulled in ten different directions at this point and become overwhelmed at where to begin to put it all out there.
There are so many wonderful things happening in my life right now. Which do I pick to write about? I guess that’s a good problem to have, right? My cup overfloweth.
As October comes to an end and winter is upon us, it is clear I am opening myself up to new possibilities. I realize flowers first bloom in spring. But in the winter, beneath the surface of our cold earth, comes the greatest work. The preparation to sprout through the ground and become something new. Something beautiful. I enter the New Year with great anticipation. It is a different anticipation than last year, as we awaited the precious gift of our new daughter. But a birth is still on the horizon for us. It’s not a baby. But something else entirely.
I have been reflecting on the past year a great deal lately. Asking God the questions I have held in my heart for far too long. Why did I deserve both the blessings and the curses in the first half of this year. Why did I have to meet people who tested me during a time when I needed only support? Why did I have to go through what I went through to come out better on the other side? Couldn’t He have just made it easy for me? Why did the high of welcoming a new baby into our lives have to be met with such dark and deep lows? I’m still not sure. But the answers are slowly being revealed, like the flower opening petal by silky petal. A beautiful mess. That is life, isn’t it? At the beginning of last year I chose to trust God no matter what happened. I can say, without a doubt, that I have stuck by that promise even when it was challenging.
I know my talents and my kindness are not for nothing. I know that I am worthy of love, of happiness, of success. I know that God has given me great love to pass on to others. He has given me gifts to share with those who choose to be and stay in my life. I am choosing to surround myself with only positive people. This has already made a huge difference in my life so far.
I feel like the past year has been one of personal growth. And the coming year will hopefully be one where I can shine. Though I have to put forth the effort and that may take me away from this blog from time to time. I will try to share with you as I am able. I have a lot of work to do to finally make some of my dreams come true. But it is some of the best work I will do.