Home | A Day in Mollywood

Drive-by Blogging

April 11, 2012 By Molly

1. Thank you for all the kind words and well wishes on my new job. My first day went well and I am very hopeful that it will be the place where I belong.

2. Even though we’re on a budget, I decided to break it and FINALLY buy myself some new clothes. I have been searching for what feels like forever for the perfect skinny jeans. I just never thought that they looked good on me. For some reason, the skin-tightness of them made me self-conscious. But I was determined yesterday and finally found a pair at New York & Company. I can’t wait to wear them with everything I own.

3. Speaking of clothes, I had a lightbulb moment on Easter morning. I bought a new dress with tons of color in it. When I pulled it out to wear it I thought, I can’t wear this. It’s too colorful! I stopped myself in the middle of that thought. I have become scared of color in my wardrobe! Why, you may ask? Because I’m scared that it will draw attention to me! OMG. What has become of me? I used to dress in order to get attention. Now I purposely dress in black and gray so people won’t look at me. The thought saddened me and I know this has got to change. I used to love bright colors. Color is going to make a comeback no matter how uncomfortable it makes me!

3. I am planning a small second birthday party for Brigham. It will just be family but I am excited because both my sisters will be in from out of town and all the kiddos will be here. I hope to get a nice photo of all five together! I decided to do a Clifford the Big Red Dog theme because Brigham loves his Clifford doll and sleeps with it every night.

4. I think I’ve figured out why I sometimes can be so unproductive on the homefront. All this time I thought it was because I am just a lazy person. But actually, I think it’s the reverse. I think I put such high standards on myself that if I can’t do it perfectly then I just won’t do it at all. For instance, I know I need to clean the boys’ bathtub. But the way I want to clean it will take at least an hour. Well, who the heck has a free hour to clean a bathtub? I know I don’t! So I decide to wait until I can do it perfectly, which is NEVER. And so the bathtub sits uncleaned for who knows how long.

I’ve got to lose this way of thinking if anything is ever going to get done. But I don’t know how to stop wanting everything to be perfect. And because things can’t be done “just so” they aren’t done at all. Does anyone know how the heck to stop this perfection madness?

5. I have been putting a lot of heartfelt thought into what I wrote about last week. The one thing that is providing me a lot of peace and comfort is my growing relationship with God. I recently purchased the One Year Bible and I am excited to read and learn and engross myself in His word. It has been ages since I owned a Bible. I am ready. I am so glad I am on this journey.

6. Speaking of books, I purchased a bunch of others with some rewards I earned at my last job. I have long awaited reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. Tears were streaming within the first few pages. I think it will change me. I was already keeping a gratitude journal but this has reinforced the importance of that task. Thank you to all who recommended it!

Filed Under: Blogging, Brigham, Home, Mommy Moments, Work 9 Comments

when one door closes

April 19, 2011 By Molly

I came home early from work one afternoon last week. I needed to pick something up that I had forgotten. It was quite cold in the house as it sets in the shade all day under cover of beautiful trees. Nature’s best umbrellas.

It was eerily quiet. Toys left behind in the mad morning dash to get out the door. A sippy cup, half full of room temperature milk, resting against the baseboard by the window.

This house has rarely been quiet the past three years. Though a small 1,000 square feet, it has held a new and growing family. Two very happy and rowdy boys.

I will never forget the joy we felt bringing baby Landon home from the hospital. I would pass by the tiny room that was to be his nursery and my lips would instantly crack a smile thinking of the day our first child would be born. I would rub my swelling belly. Feel him kick from the inside. And know that everything was going to be okay.

And the utter frustration I felt with not having a nursery to decorate for baby Brigham. Until I finally gave into the fact that we lived in a two-bedroom house and Brigham was going to need to squeeze into a bassinet beside his mommy. Did you know Brigham has slept next to me the entire first year of his life? I had the pleasure of waking to his sweet face every morning. How silly I was to complain. The lack of space turned out to be a blessing.

It is surreal to think that in just two days we will part ways with these walls that have been our safe-haven, our home, for four years. Suddenly, all those little things that drove me crazy about this house, don’t seem so bad anymore.

That short funky looking tree in the backyard. The owners before us said it was a peach tree. But all it ever yielded was tiny green balls, which fell from the tree, rotted and caused bees to buzz all around our backdoor. Goodbye short funky “peach” tree.

The biggest of one of only two closets, which happened to be in the nursery and not the master bedroom, housed my clothes. And then Landon’s clothes. And then Landon and Brigham’s clothes. It was only after we moved in that we realized there was no light in this closet. It did, however, have a tiny window. Many a night I put away clothes with only the help of the moonlight. Goodbye tiny window.

And the front door that I painted red in an effort to boost curb appeal. Oh, how it did a terrible job of keeping the winter’s draft out. The cause for extra blankets and a snuggie, which I proudly wore to keep toasty. Goodbye drafty red door.

And all the many other things I thought I hated . . .

the way the wood floors creaked

the way the doors closed on their own (due to unlevel floors – not a ghost)

the way my husband and I were made to cuddle because the master bedroom was frightfully cold in the winter

None of that matters anymore. Now all I can think about is how our sons both took their first steps on those wood floors that creaked. They did their first everything here. There is a sadness to leave it all behind. I just have to remember that our family’s story began here. But it certainly does not end.

And someday, when my sons ask me if they ever lived anywhere else . . .

I will smile. Nod my head. And remember that beautiful red door, which will always hold such precious memories behind it.

Filed Under: Family, Home, Mommy Moments 11 Comments

Welcome to Our New Home

March 29, 2011 By Molly

Thanks for dropping by!

Just ring the doorbell (OMG, I have a doorbell!)

and come on in . . .

To the right is our formal dining area

I super pink puffy heart the arched walls.

but I think baby Brigham likes exploring on the fluffy frieze carpet.

I always wanted a dramatic entryway. I think I finally got my wish.

Our living space is flooded with natural light, which we l.o.v.e.

and this is the perfect “hang out” spot for our fam.

My boys were already breaking it in with a good old fashioned wrestling match.

Ahhhhh, space to spread out. Finally!

See that fireplace? I can turn it on with a flip of a switch. Modern day romance.

Oh, what’s that below, you ask?

Just an awesome kitchen in which I swear I will learn to cook something yummy.

Center island? Check. Granite Counters? Check. Energy-efficient SS appliances? Check.

But wait! What’s this cabinet?

Why it’s not a cabinet at all! It’s our WALK-IN PANTRY!
(also known as Landon’s new hiding spot)

That door leads to our three-car garage. Naaman is already researching tool storage. Men.

This adorable little hallway leads to the powder room.

The toilets in our house are cute. I don’t know how else to put it.

Towel racks & mirrors are included. Thank God something is.

The hallway also serves as a sort of mudroom space with a sweeeeet built in for coats

and lots of dirty, muddy boy shoes. Just what we needed for this family of boys.

Also in this hallway is the door to the full basement. As you can see it is unfinished. But this is our big project. We will be finishing this space to bring the total square footage to over 3,000!

See those beautiful wood floors? They are 5″ hand scraped real wood. As a lover of wood floors they make me drool.

So there you have it, folks. That’s the first floor. I am so excited I find I can’t sleep at night. It’s a lot of beige but we will remedy that in time. I’m ready to infuse our house with color and style. I’m so excited. Wait, did I already say that?

Stay tuned for a tour of the second floor (OMG, we have a second floor!!!)

Did you like seeing my house today? Click below to give me a little boost? =)

Filed Under: Home, home tour, Stuff I Love 32 Comments

Our New Nest

March 24, 2011 By Molly

We’re flying the coop soon and we’ll be landing here . . .

They just planted the trees and laid the sod! Details and a tour of the inside to come soon . . .

I honestly cannot believe we’re going to live here in less than one month! It is perfect!

Filed Under: Home, Stuff I Love 17 Comments

I am not a mathemagician

March 19, 2011 By Molly

Thank you to TurboTax for sponsoring my writing about household finances.Learn more about how TurboTax can help you find every tax deduction you deserve. I was selected for this sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity, as I do.

_____________________________________________________________________

I handle the finances in our household. A fact which is laughable. You see, I am not a mathemagician. I was an English major. Trained to spot a typographical error from a mile away. But college algebra? Yeah, it took me three tries to pass that class (sorry, mom and dad).

The only reason I handle the finances is because I am a control freak. Admittedly I’m not stellar at keeping up with bills. Another reason I thank God for the internet and auto bill pay. Otherwise I might not be typing this post after our electricity is turned off due to failure to pay.

I don’t do well remembering when a bill is due or organizing my mail in a way that helps me find something I need fast. But I can say with certainty that online banking changed my life and my finances. Checkbook? What’s that? I cannot remember the last time I used an actual check. And I never carry cash.

My iPhone helps too with a handy little app I use to keep track of all our accounts. Now I just press a button and voila! I know exactly how much money we have in our checking, savings and retirement accounts. I can also see our credit and loan accounts as well (I don’t like those as much but it’s nice to keep track of those too).

I have even done our taxes online for the past two years with the help of TurboTax. The first year was a bit rough putting in all the info. But this year was a breeze since they kept all the info stored from last year. It took me an hour to enter the info and send it off!

The hubs and I have tried a number of different ways to budget. Unfortunately, no one way has ever worked for us. Oh, I once had big plans for our financial future. Popular books from Dave Ramsey, David Bach and Suze Orman are all stacked in the basement currently gathering dust. I read them all and liked what they had to say. I’m just not sure we had the willpower to follow any of their advice.

But since we are moving to a new house soon with a plumper mortgage payment our lack of discipline and communication regarding money needs to change. We will no longer be able to go on impromptu Target shopping sprees and buy unnecessary junk with wild abandon. ::sobs into her empty coin purse::

Even so, I am looking forward to this new challenge of being a tightwad. I think a brand new house is just the kick in the butt we need to figure out exactly where our money is going and to come up with a solid plan!

We’re like #1 trillion on the list. If you read my blog give it a boost, please?

Filed Under: Finances, Home, Marriage, Reviews 5 Comments

Your ONE Word

March 18, 2011 By Molly

Because three words is not really necessary this time.

I have waited a year and a half to type these words so just hang on while I wipe the tears of joy from my eyes . . .

WE SOLD OUR HOUSE!!!

It took 45 days this time. Not too shabby. We had a third showing last week and had an offer that night. I wanted to wait to post until the inspection went through. I was so nervous I felt like puking all day yesterday. But we’re in the clear!

Just waiting to firm up the details but it looks like our home will be getting a new owner on April 21st.

And now, we need to figure out where we’re gonna live. Because, you know, it will be kind of important to have a place to go when we move out of the old house. We need a place to sleep.

Seriously guys, there were times I thought this would NEVER happen for us. Honestly, I put all my trust in God this time around. I knew He would provide the answer for our little family in His time. And it was only when I let go of trying to control the process that it finally happened. Isn’t that always how it is?

Thank you to all of my readers who hoped and prayed right along with me. I cannot thank you enough!

I am so excited for the next chapter of our lives to begin. Stay tuned for photos of our soon-to-be new home!

Link up with Your Three Words at Jenni’s blog

Filed Under: Home, Stuff I Love, Your Three Words 19 Comments

How my kids taught me what home is.

January 29, 2011 By Molly

I know I’ve mentioned before that we would like to move to a bigger house. I’ve said this, oh, maybe like a thousand times? Now that our house is back on the market we’ve taken down all of our personal photos. No more wedding pictures or photos of my two beautiful sons. Just mirrors and generic decor. I walked through today and looked at what it has become. It actually made me kind of sad.

Our little bungalow is a little over 1,000 square feet and with a lot of stuff it can feel like the walls are closing in on us. There are times when I feel like we’re honestly all on top of one another. But here’s the thing. Since when did closeness become a problem?

This house was built in 1924. I think there is a reason that houses used to be built with smaller footprints. People didn’t feel the need for 2,500+ square foot houses. Not that a house that big is bad. But just think about it? Most older homes have less square footage, one-car garages, less closets (and forget about walk-ins!). They had smaller floor plans overall. Many families bought one home and stayed there for fifty years. The neighborhood was like one big family.

For instance, the cute older couple across the street from us. They got married, bought their first (and only) house and raised their family there. They are still there. They will most likely die there. I think that’s really special.

What has changed in the last fifty years that makes us think bigger is better? And are we all really better off?

Don’t get me wrong. I am excited to move on and have more space. I think it will make life easier in so many ways.

Sometimes I get down in the dumps about our small house. I started thinking about how sad I feel that Brigham is 9-months-old and is a nomad in his own home. He spent his first six months in a bassinet next to me in our tiny bedroom. He spent a couple of months in his brother’s hand-me-down crib before we realized sharing a room wasn’t going to work due to Brigham’s sleep schedule. Or lack thereof.

Now he sleeps in our living room, in a pack & play that my parents found at a garage sale. And ya know what? He sleeps better there than he ever has before. There’s no pretty hand-made mobile above a Pottery Barn crib. His name is not spelled out in pretty letters and placed above him. He doesn’t have $300 crib bedding. But he is happy. He is safe. He is warm.

He is loved.

Both of my boys are so very loved. Frankly, it doesn’t really matter where I am when I show love for my family. As long as that love is heard and felt. That is all that matters.

I try to imagine how Landon will react when we move to our new house. I have played that day over and over in my head. Moving day. How sweet it will be.

But the truth is, he loves our home. He loves it just as it is now. He doesn’t care that it’s small or that he has to share a room with his brother from time to time. He doesn’t care that the wood floors creak when he runs up and down on them. He doesn’t care that we got new carpet in his bedroom. All he cares about is that his mommy and daddy and brother are there. Here is where we tuck him in. Here is where I softly sing to him before he shuts his eyes at night. That’s what makes it home to him.

And I think that says it all.

This is home. Because it’s where our family is.

coming home

Filed Under: Brigham, Family, Home, Landon 9 Comments

To Whom It May Concern

December 15, 2010 By Molly

Dear Santa,

::wads up paper and throws in the trash::

Dear God,

::wads up paper and throws in the trash::

To Whom it May Concern:

I am aware that most people are counting down the days until Christmas. I, of course, am looking forward to this most joyous holiday as well. However, there is another important countdown that has been on my mind lately.

In 17 days our house will go on the market. again. January 1, 2011. That is the day. The day that will begin what I hope will be a quick process to our fresh start. Last time it wasn’t a quick process. It was the longest.shittiest.process ever. Our house sat on the market for six months. I tried to clean and organize while entertaining a constantly up-to-no-good toddler. And did I mention I was pregnant during this time? No? Well, I was. It sucked. That is, the cleaning sucked. Not the having a new baby part. That part was pretty awesome.

Anyway, I wanted to write this letter asking you for one thing. Er, two things actually, if it’s not too much trouble. I wasn’t quite sure on who to address in this letter. But hopefully, just by writing it, it will get to the right person.

#1. Let our house sell
#2. Let us build a new house

You see, last time I feel like I begged and prayed and PLEADED with anyone who would listen to puh-leeze just let our house sell. Although it is cute it is not big enough for our family of four. We have two bedrooms and though some nights the brothers-sharing-a-room-thing works, other nights it’s an absolute nightmare. When the baby starts crying and screaming the toddler gets woken up too. And fat chance getting both of them to go back to sleep. My husband and I aren’t getting much sleep. Our baby is seven-months-old and sleep is still like trying to find water in a desert. I hate to sound greedy. Because I know our boys having their own rooms isn’t a necessity. But separate rooms would sure help a lot.

I accepted the fact that I didn’t get to create a beautiful nursery for my second son. And in turn, you provided me with six amazing months of him sleeping right next to me. I accepted the fact that I lost my closet and gave up most of my clothes and shoes to Goodwill. And in turn, you provided me with the most amazing job I could have asked for at the perfect time!

I have watched as others sold their homes and moved on. I offer congratulations and wish them well as they pack up their boxes and begin their new adventure. I am truly happy for them although it takes a lot of pride-swallowing to get there. But I still look out my window and wonder why my view remains the same. Why, when my heart feels so full with a desire, has it been fulfilled for others. But not for us? When will it be our turn?

I know if we had to we could make this house work for longer but I feel I’ve been patient. We just want a house that makes more sense for our family. Where our boys can have room to play and not knock stuff over at every turn because the walls are closing in on us.

Last time, when six months came and went, I finally accepted that we would have to stay a bit longer. I’m even prepared to be here another six months if that’s what it takes. But please. Oh, please. Let it sell this time. Let someone come in and fall in love with it. Just like we did nearly four years ago.

We’ve done so much to make it right for someone.

Drastic price reduction
Brand new carpet in the bedroom
Brand new energy efficient windows
Brand new patio door
Brand new matching range
Neutral paint
Rental furniture to stage the house
I’m even willing to throw in my front loading washer and dryer (believe me, I will cry if I have to leave them behind)

Everything else has fallen into place in our lives. Except this. I know the market is still terrible. But I also know that this house is a good house. And there is someone out there right now whose new house is waiting. It’s cozy. It’s welcoming. It’s ready. Will you send them our way?

Sincerely,
Hopeful Sellers

p.s.

I thought I would show you what I dream of every night. It’s the house we have chosen to build when our current house sells. Please, whoever you are, help us get here. This is perfect. This is our new home. This is where my boys will grow up.

Filed Under: Double Trouble, Finances, Home, Silly Me 7 Comments

No really. I promise I am.

November 25, 2010 By Molly

This week has been hard. Our Sunday morning was beautiful. But by Sunday afternoon Brigham had projectile vomited all over me. Landon decided he would barf while I was filling up at Quick Trip to make the half hour ride back to our house. I took twenty minutes to get it just clean enough so we could make it home (while breathing through my mouth). He spent the rest of the night throwing up. And we spent the rest of the night cleaning it up and consoling our very sick boy.

At 3:00 a.m. Naaman brought Landon into bed with us because he had vomited again. That’s when I knew I had the stomach flu too. I missed work on Monday. And actually passed out in the bathroom that night while throwing up. I woke up with the thud on the floor and called out for Naaman to help me because I was too weak to get up. Naaman had to call into work because I couldn’t work on Tuesday either.

On Wednesday we were finally all feeling better. We put the boys in daycare because Naaman and I had big plans. Plans to deep clean our house. Plans to paint. Plans to organize the basement and put some things away in a new storage unit. All those big things we just can’t seem to get done with two little ones always at our feet.

At noon my phone rang. Brigham had thrown up and we had to go get him. I picked Landon up while I was there. In the middle of his nap. Big mistake. He would not finish his nap when we got home and was a mess for the rest of the day. Instead of crossing things off my too-often ignored to-do list I sat and listened to his epic meltdowns.

Brigham slept for 3.5 hours. He never naps that long so we knew he must be sick. When he finally did wake up he had what can only be considered the WORST dirty diaper of the century. Wanna know how bad? It was so bad that we had to throw his clothes away and immediately put him in the bath because it was in his hair! I don’t think I’ve ever done this much laundry in my life.

I know what you’re thinking. It’s Thanksgiving? Why of all the days is she complaining on her blog today? Let me get right to the point.

Even with the nightmare that I just described . . . I’m still thankful.

I’m thankful that our immune systems are strong enough to let us get well when we get sick.

I’m thankful for the patience that it takes to take care of two sick babies.

I’m thankful for our jobs and that they are understanding when we have to miss work sometimes.

I’m thankful for our house. No matter how much work it needs and how much I want a new one. I still love it.

I’m thankful for my husband. Who loves me so much he’ll wipe my puke up off the floor and still tell me I’m pretty.

I’m thankful for my two sick and fussy boys who, as I write this, are peacefully sleeping in the next room.

I’m thankful for my snot-nosed, toddler meltdown, dirty diaper, broken plans, vomit-covered, crazy, wonderful life.

No really. I promise I am.

I hope you have a crazy wonderful ~~better than the day described above~~ Thanksgiving full of life and emotion . . . just like our little Landon.

Filed Under: Adventures in Parenting, Brigham, Holidays, Home, Landon, Naaman, Sickies 4 Comments

Sweet November

November 22, 2010 By Molly

It is near 70 degrees on a Sunday in November. Landon and I go exploring together in my parents backyard. I fervently capture his every move. I see so much of him in me. His blonde hair. His blue eyes. But also a spirit filled with love of nature and adventure. Oh, how I hope that part of him always stays alive. That when the cold of winter comes into his life he might always remember the promise that spring, summer and fall will return with a kiss of sun on his cheek.

I watch as he skips across the three acre yard from end to end. Fence to fence. He delights in every detail. He plays as if he could take flight at any moment. His bangs whipping with the strength of the wind.

It feels eerily familiar. Years ago I did the same things. In the same yard. When I was a child I never knew a different home than this. I never knew a different world than this.

Here, in this little square space, I discovered the world. One tree, one leaf, one season at a time. But on this day, I watch as my son’s eyes soak up all nature has to offer.

The security I felt in this place has never been stronger anywhere else. I know that might sound strange to some. Especially since I have my own family now. My own home. But when you live in the same house for 20+ years, well, nothing else seems fitting but the word home. I think it will always be home. No matter where I am.

My heart soars to know that it remains a safe-haven for my children all these years later. That they might climb the same trees. Play hide & seek in the same bushes.

And someday, when my parents are gone, my children are grown and I am in the winter of my life. This house will belong to a new growing family. But I will remember one sweet day in November when the roses were on fire.